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Old 09-05-2018, 11:49 PM   #31 (permalink)
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I answered a scam once stating that I was an adult toy shop. You could practically hear their embarrassment while they apologized for a wrong number and they would remove it from the list.
No, no please, I can't allow you to hang up because customer satisfaction... is our guarantee."
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Old 09-06-2018, 08:28 AM   #32 (permalink)
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I've been thinking of just answering "911, what's your emergency" when a see a blatant scam call come in.
I've been very fortunate to have a whole squad room at my house to answer the phone. Depending on who is on duty, the phone might get answered by Detective Harris, Fish, Deitrich, Wojohowitz and if it's really busy Captain Miller answers.

"Robbery, Detective Harris speaking..."
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Old 09-06-2018, 08:28 AM   #33 (permalink)
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Aparently without ever buying a ticket I won the European lotto three different times. They only needed my account info for the lump sum deposit for one of the winnings. The other two needed a $1000 each processing fee.
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Old 09-06-2018, 09:23 AM   #34 (permalink)
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So, have you been arrested yet? Just wondering. Your wife will need some comforting, unless Mar has gotten there first.
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Old 09-06-2018, 09:35 AM   #35 (permalink)
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Oh, this is great.
Since the only people that ever call me are work, a couple friends that are cool about it, and the student loan scams, I'm just going to answer every single call like it's my work's dispatch calling.
"Hey, Jim. Which funeral home's getting this one?"
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Old 09-06-2018, 09:53 AM   #36 (permalink)
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I get these calls every 2 months. Messages threading arrest or a warrant has been issued. I call them back and demand the press forward with the legal complaint, so we can all meet in court. When they threaten to have me arrested I tell them to have the officers bring cookies for the ride downtown. They stop calling for about a month and then it starts over.
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Old 09-06-2018, 09:56 AM   #37 (permalink)
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But has anyone called about duct cleaning yet?

It took my dad about 2 years to get them to go away even after threatening legal action (he's on a no call list) and I believe following through on the threat, blowing a fox 40 whistle into the phone, and other such shenanigans. They've only called me twice. I just tell them I don't have any ducts.
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Old 09-06-2018, 10:43 AM   #38 (permalink)
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I just got the car insurance call for a Toyota I don't own. Sadly nothing hilarious came to mind so I just told them my Toyota has 0 miles and is running perfectly, then hung up.
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